Saturday, June 14, 2014

Turn Turn Turn

As I was driving the other day, the song “Turn! Turn! Turn!” by the Byrds came on the radio. Suddenly I found myself captivated by the lyrics I have heard probably thousands of times in my lifetime. For whatever reason, this time they really had profound meaning to me.

"Turn! Turn! Turn!”  by the Byrds

To everything - turn, turn, turn
There is a season - turn, turn, turn
And a time to every purpose under heaven

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep

I entered into a melancholy state, reflecting on the last decade of my life; all the changes, the losses as well as the gains, the pain, and all the joy.

Ten years ago at this time we were packing up for a dream vacation to Hawaii. I was feeling great, in the best shape of my life, so much so that I even donned my first bikini as we lay upon the beach. I felt wonderful and we made memories to last a lifetime.
Where did the time go? What happened to my life? I blinked and suddenly it’s 10 years later.

My work now vs. 10 years ago is without a doubt infinitely more rewarding, but I am making less money than I used to. A loss? Perhaps, if you look at it as strictly dollars and cents. Would I do it again? You bet. I was dying a slow torturous death at a job I disliked greatly. It was a phenomenal gain for me to shift gears, go back to school, and go in another direction. I am truly blessed because I love my work now.

Several close friends have entered my life within the last 10 years, and each and every one of them left a permanent fingerprint on my heart. A dear friend can shine the light in midst of total darkness.

In 2010 I ran 2 marathons, and logged over 1000 miles….now, I cannot even run around the block. This stings a lot, and feels like a tremendous loss. However, I will not give up hope, nor will I view this as a permanent situation. There has to be a reason for the tumultuous times, the storms of our lives, the ups and downs. I believe one of those reasons is for us to learn from the experience and grow stronger because of the setbacks. Maybe, just maybe, armed with this new knowledge, I can then pay it forward and help someone who may share the same struggles.

Whilst being grounded from running, I feel fortunate that I find I have more time to focus on my writing & personal growth.

It’s rather ironic how confining yet liberating a situation can be. Having my left foot in a boot has definitely forced me to slow down, to take the time to stop and smell the roses. It helps me appreciate things so much more.

It’s an old wives tale that you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Yes, change is more difficult, but its absolutely necessary to grow as a person. I don’t want my life to become so predictable and still that it becomes a stagnant pond full of mosquitoes.

Toss me a lifejacket and churn up that water! It’s gonna be a wild ride!

"A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time for love, a time for hate
A time for peace, I swear it's not too late!"

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